I don't know why but lately I have been trying to just ignore the fact that I am sick. I had a very good couple of weeks. I should of been testing but I did not want to. I am paying for it today, I am pooped. I don't want to be sick anymore, I love my job teaching and I have the ability to touch many lives. I was at a Planning conference this last week and was very inspired to be the best that I can be, but........I also had a huge sence of guilt, when I am sick I can't put in 100% and that is just not fair to my students. I am very confused as to what I should do. This disease has taken so much life from me. I want it back. I had 2 glasses of wine friday night and it felt so good, except the electrical shocks that it sent down my arms, I did not tell anyone I just wanted to have a good night. Last week I also had my left side of my face droop but it was very short lived so again I did not tell anyone. I just want ALL of this to go away, before I lose more of my life.I want to be well. I want to be full of life, energy, love, fun, hope and all the wonderful things life can offer.