I love and I live

I always try to forgive

I must put God first more often

My heart I must soften

I must learn to adapt

I must find where I've snapped

Repairing the past

The tears that outlast

The resolve that I find

Yet dissolves in my mind

For each new day brings terror

And my own human error

I love and I live

Myself I cannot forgive

Myself I do not forget

I haven't given up yet

I don't want to fight anymore

This internal war

This infernal nightmare

While awake I must fight there.

NO more feverish nights

NO more inexplainable fright

NO more unrefreshing sleep

NO more abyss that's too deep

I want freedom from this

I want a sweet dream with a kiss

To wake me up from this pain

To revive me again

I want to be loved and accepted

Not shunned or rejected

TO be heard with validation

TO be filled with elation.