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First Blog!


missaf

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I've decided to keep my blog about Cushing's here rather than where I normally keep it.

 

Today I am feeling warm and energetic. I had lots of heart-pounding in my head -- is that hypertension? My hump has ached today, and in turn, my neck aches. I didn't get dizzy when standing today that I noticed, but I did have lots of trouble getting up off the floot.

 

I checked my stretch marks today and they are mean and red, some purple, so started a 24 hour at 8pm. All my salivaries are done, so I'm hoping the first 6 are low to medium, and the last two are sky high *crosses fingers*

 

I'm wondering today if I don't test positive for CD, perhaps the tumor might be causing the hypopit Dr. F thinks I might have?

 

If I feel this high tomorrow, I'm heading to the PCP's office to have her check my blood pressure.

 

This is all so confusing and overwhelming. The closer surgery comes, the more scared I get. I'm a single mom with a dad with advanced heart disease and probable CD himself (He's got ALL the classic S&S!). I have no one that could go with me to MDA, but I want to trust IMCC with my care. UGH! This is the worst part of being single! I don't want to go alone after the last time I was in the hospital and was denied my pain meds and I was in so much pain I couldn't advocate for myself.

 

I'm scared to go without someone on my side after my BFF's mom died of AI and infections. I'm scared of the aftercare without maybe a Visiting nurse or hospice or something. I'm scared of the bills for going to Texas for the hospital hotel! I'm on disability and barely making it as is!

 

One day at a time works for a while, but some days I just have to unload! This worry and concern is killing me!

 

I haven't emailed Dr. F yet -- I'm waiting for all of my Cushing's workup to come back before I do.

 

AHHHHH! Make this roller coaster stop.

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