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About SleepyTimeTea

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    Long-time Board Member

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    In Limbo
  1. I have accomplished nothing much. I hadn't kept up on this forum and should have done a lot more. I now know I weigh more than a whopping 440 lbs because I couldn't even weigh on this one scale my friend just bought for herself. I need to find out if this is some kind of medical condition caused by something abnormal or if this is weight I can lose and have just gained and gained easily over the years. It is going to be even harder now. I am following weight watchers and will start swimming this week, but aside from that the medical testing will have to start all over again because I hardly go
  2. I have no idea what I am doing here, but thought I would at least say hello. Last year I went bananas before Christmas from my OCD which I hate with a passion. I never did find out what was wrong because I never followed up on tests. I just turned 33 this past August. I cannot believe it had already been almost a year or so since I had been on here posting. Maybe this next year will be more fruitful. I can always hope.
  3. Dear self, Today has been filled with some moments of happiness. Despite all my struggles I am still alive and kicking here. I am lonely. That is always the hardest part. Yes, I am blessed to have hubby, but I am still lonely. I miss my best friend Mikki. But, I have no idea where she went. My other friend, well she obviously does not want to be friends with me anymore because I am too fat, or because she changed religions, or who knows what. Oh well, such is life. I miss Mikki most of all. Here I am, stuck here almost every day and it gets so old. I thank God for the internet and being able
  4. I have a sink full of dishes. I managed to sweep the floor today. But I have felt too weak and down to do much else. Scooped out the cat box and hubby dumped that out in the dumpster. I have been feeling stranger by the minute lol. I dunno anymore how to describe how I feel, except it is hard sometimes. I am not terribly depressed today, just don't feel up to much. I have been a little lonely and wondering what has happened to a couple of my overseas pen pals from online. My one friend/email pen pal is in the UAE and she is an intern at a hospital. She had bene going through some rou
  5. Who after so many years of being heavy tried many ways to lose weight including things that people only assume that really skinny people do. She had ups and downs and some successes only to fail and fail again. She thought about trying to starve herself and even had fasted here and there. Now she sits today trying once again to gain control because she really doesn't know if she will be able to lose weight even by eating healthy...but it is possible. So she is trying to maintain a healthy balance instead of self destructive behaviour... Some day...this woman would like to be healthy and at
  6. awww, this poor little guy... Well hopefully they can help him out so he can have a normal life...
  7. YEAH! I went to bed before 4 am... It is a miracle and I was up at 8 am. I would have slept in longer but our cats are too noisty. Maybe I am finally getting somewhere with getting back on a somewhat "normal schedule". I am still tired yes, but at least I am up with the sun and not going to bed with it. I may just have to start taking a small nap mid day to help with the crazy fatigue. Not much planned today, just gonna spend some time with hubby
  8. Thank God it is Friday...my hubby said that too this morning as he took off on the bike to go to work. We both are just hoping to spend some time together, without excess baloney and exhaustion. I am still trying to normalize my sleeping schedule. Got sick a bit yesterday afternoon with the room spinning and fatigue hitting me like a ton of bricks...even before I had to take some benadryl. Needless to say that messed me up still. I am going to try to sleep just a little while this morning and wait up till the evening. I have got to get this straightened out. Made hubby breakfast
  9. Yeah, nothing much going on here. But, I am hoping to be able to at least get the dishes cleaned up since I am not so weak and sore today oh and make a decent supper for us. The weather is nice, and it is quiet here. At least it makes for a peaceful day.
  10. I learned from my mother yesterday that my brother found some nephrologist at one of the bigger hospitals around here that may have been actually decent. Considering the luck and lack of help I have had from the one I just saw, and the one I had before...it figures. THIS nephrologist supposedly told my brother that he/she though my brother had CUSHINGS! because of a buffalo hump and other symptoms. According to my mother, my brother does not believe he could have Cushings. THERE is something wrong with my poor brother. Despite his and mine inability to get along most ouf our lives, he has a lo
  11. SELF DOUBT And reasoning Are incompatible in my life Irrational fears are rational now For loss has been at every turn I survive... That is all I do For my basic needs are almost met But never completely met I survive I keep hanging on to the thread Somewhere in my heart Somewhere in my dreams There is a beautiful tree in a meadow That I long to hold on to I long to reach out for But it is not tangible The green leaves turning up toward the sun By a river This tree is never thirsty, never hungry, never lonely Even though it stands alone It never experiences self-doubt Th
  12. Thank you Lydia, even though it is not my b day anymore. I welcome your wishes for a better year with much progress. HUGS
  13. Some days, I just don't think I can keep goin on like this. And there are some other things so completely out of my control that are affecting my health too, and I want to toss them out the window. ENOUGH SAID
  14. Thank you so much for posting your interview. I am so happy that you are already doing better. Thank God your dad saw the show about Cushings and was able to help you too. Peace Michelle
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